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DISTINCT & DIFFERENT • IN HAPPY WAYS

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ME • Don't Worry, 3 Ways to Be Happy

7/26/2013

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This research into the 3 different lives that lead to happiness answers a few questions that some of us have. Namely, how can people who do contrary to the Lord's gospel be happy? And how can people who do and sacrifice so much for the gospel still be happy? The principles and practices our LDS lifestyle matched up to the happy life ideas Seligman talks about might give a little insight. (MY thoughts are  listed below in pink.) 
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I believe there are three different... happy lives.  - Martin Seligman
1 • THE PLEASANT LIFE
The first happy life is the pleasant life. This is a life in which you have as much positive emotion as you possibly can, and the skills to amplify it.... they're extremely social.... They don't spend time alone. Each of them is in a romantic relationship and each has a rich repertoire of friends.... when we teach people about the pleasant life, how to have more pleasure in your life, one of your assignments is to... design a beautiful day. Next Saturday, set a day aside, design yourself a beautiful day, and use savoring and mindfulness [Skills] to enhance those pleasures. And we can show in that way that the pleasant life is enhanced.  - Martin Seligman
THE PLEASANT 
LDS LIFE...
WARD SOCIALS
PARTIES & DANCES
MEETINGS
REUNIONS
CELEBRATIONS
COMMEMORATIONS

YOUTH PROGRAMS
PRIMARY

RELIEF SOCIETY

FRIENDS
RECREATION
2 • THE ENGAGED LIFE
The second is a life of engagement -- a life in your work, your parenting, your love, your leisure, time stops for you. That's what Aristotle was talking about. The second path is eudaimonian [happiness that's from an active life governed by reason] flow....during flow, you can't feel anything. You're one with the music. Time stops. You have intense concentration. And this is indeed the characteristic of what we think of as the good life....  Your assignment, [a Gratitude Visit] is to write a 300-word testimonial to that person... [someone who did something enormously important that changed your life in a good direction, and who you never properly thanked] show up at their door, you read the testimonial.... And what happens is when we test people one week later, a month later, three months later, they're both happier and less depressed.  - Martin Seligman
THE ENGAGED 
LDS LIFE...
EDUCATION
INTELLIGENCE
LIGHT & TRUTH
SCRIPTURES
PRAYER

CREATING
INDIVIDUALITY
HOLY GHOST
PROCREATION
TESTIMONY
REPENTANCE
FAITH
WORK
LOVE
3 • THE MEANINGFUL LIFE
And third, the meaningful life. So I want to say a little bit about each of those lives and what we know about them. And the third path is meaning. This is the most venerable of the happinesses, traditionally. And meaning, in this view, consists of -- very parallel to eudaimonia -- it consists of knowing what your highest strengths are, and using them to belong to and in the service of something larger than you are.... Another [assignment] is a strength date, in which we get couples to identify their highest strengths on the strengths test, and then to design an evening in which they both use their strengths, and we find this is a strengthener of relationships.... [Another idea]When you do something philanthropic to help another person, it lasts and it lasts.  - Martin Seligman
THE MEANINGFUL 
LDS LIFE...
CALLINGS
LEADERSHIP
TITHES
OFFERINGS
DONATIONS
PRIESTHOOD
TEMPLES
DATE NIGHTS

SEALINGS
PLAN OF SALVATION
CHILDREN
FORGIVENESS
RESULTS
"... we ask the question as a function of the three different lives, 
how much life satisfaction do you get?" 
It turns out the pursuit of pleasure has almost no contribution to life satisfaction.... Where pleasure matters is if you have both engagement and you have meaning, then pleasure's the whipped cream and the cherry.

The pursuit of engagement is also very strong. 

The pursuit of meaning is the strongest.  - Martin Seligman


It was interesting to see which areas I spend my time doing and my relative happiness. So, really I shouldn't be weary in well-doing. So should the phrase be, 'don't weary, be happy'? Okay, I'll say it, "uhh No!" Looking at this, lives 2 & 3 are where I want to be most. But I do like a little whipped cream pleasure in my life. 


What would you add to these lists?
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